Tag Archive | rant

Greedy kids

It’s pretty easy to get me mad. Generally, I hate idiots, whiners and lazy-asses, and I instantly get mad when they appear in my info-space, be it online or offline. But there’s one more category of people whose mere existence gets me fucking frothing foam at me mouth when I think about it – greedy kids. This particular rant brought to you, in part, by greedy gamedevs on Kickstarter.

Imagine yourself a game project which is nothing special, typical top-down arcade for mobiles, built with Unity3D, more than halfway there (judging by the videos and screenshots), looking to raise a whooping $40K on Kickstarter.

I’m not a rich man, you know, but a pretty good developer. $40K is what I’ve been doing in a year as a Senior iOS Developer in a major russian mobile-dev company. That’s enough for a family of three to live a beautiful life for a year – in Russia. So, imagine my reaction when I see a project which is month (max) until it’s ready asking for that kind of money. I’m really struggling to find an English equivalent of Russian “да вы охуели”, because “you fucking outta your fucking mind” doesn’t nearly have the same level of expression.

You think that’s all? There’re stretch goals in their project, first being PC/Mac/Linux version if $75K is pledged. Just think about it – a Unity3D game for mobiles, turn the camera from portrait to landscape, adjust it a bit, throw in couple lines of code to enable keyboard/mouse/gamepad controls that’s already in the engine – hurray, $35K covered. WHAT? I’m really struggling to find Russian obscene lexical equivalent for my emotions on this one.

There’s a reason for my rage. Railyard: Match-3 Evolved is a project I soloed in 2 months and released for 5 platforms, take a look what a single dev can do with a budget of $500. (It would’ve been $200 less if I wasn’t so picky about Unity3D free-vs-pro features.)

Stay fucking hungry, no matter how many millions your projects made. And if you really want to back some Kickstarted campaign, back these guys ’cause they’re oldschool and doing an awesome job.

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The Door Solution

Everybody in #gamedev today seem to be hyped by the recent blog post about what game designer does. You can read that, if you want. But don’t. You already know what game designer does, or at least you can make an educated guess. (If you can’t, you probably in the wrong blog.)

Here’s an unpopular point of view – not everything needs explaining. Imagine yourself a game designer, who had to spend an entire hour of his precious time to explain what he does for a living to his relatives or schoolmates he sees once in 5 years or so. Time is now wasted. Does he feel better? Does he? What changed in his life? What the knowledge he brought changed in the life of listeners? The answers are “no” and “nothing”.

If you need to explain, you don’t have to explain, so don’t. Mind your game. Players don’t give a flying fuck about your roles in a team, they only care about final product and the team as a whole.

Got no soul to sell

I’ve got perfect memory for games. I’ve been playing for about 28 years now, starting at the age of 7. If you’d ask me for a list, I wouldn’t know where to start, but name a game – and I tell you if I’ve played or not, and if I did, I remember enough details to pinpoint a genre.

No surprise that over the course of those years I’ve become so fed up with games, that to stir some kind of interest and make me spend more than one short evening on a game, they got to show either some gameplay novelty or some really good storytelling, or better both. That’s the reason I hate multiplayer – no novelty, no story, only hordes of annoying kids who don’t have a single idea of how to behave in a socium. And that’s the reason why, when approached with a question of favourite games in a specific genre, I’d unmistakably choose something from a pre-f2p era.

So, you designing a game? Do you want people to remember what you did, in a good way – in 20+ years? You see, there’s a fine, almost invisible line that separates games as an art or games as a sport, which both are fun and, well, games – and games as a product, sometimes so devoid of soul that the Devil himself would sell you some. It’s OK to balance the shit out of your design, spending countless hours on playtesting, simulating crazy-ass random gameplay situations. But when you start talking about “perfect difficulty curve of peaks and valleys to maximize user retention” – that’s where I draw the line.

The reason for this rant is that everybody seems to want to learn marketing, sales and shit, and nobody wants to learn how to build something that is fun and looks good.

What do you want?